Tickle · the · Pear

Baby Z regularly gets comments from friends and strangers on how cute/adorable/handsome he is, so I know it's not just some evolutionary reflex in my reptilian brain that provokes the squee. (Yes, his hair is always like that.)

MoBob is out with Zacky and the SIL at a farm in Virginia to slaughter sheep. I went to the BYU Political Affairs Society conference. That's how we roll! I was impressed with the conference's bipartisan spirit. Though the majority of speakers were from the conservative side and I'm sure a lot of the participants were as well, the keynote speaker, John Podesta, was a Clinton admin official and is now with the Center for American Progress, and Sui Lang (my Relief Society president) and I were the Mormon Democrat panelists. I was especially impressed with the first night's speaker, Rep. Salmon from AZ, who talked movingly about his gay son and the importance of reaching across the aisle in Congress.

Last night however was pure fun. We went to the Trapeze School student and staff show. Honestly I'd be scared to climb the ladder that high, let alone actually fly.

I wonder how his hat stayed on.

Sometimes it sucks, and sometimes it's wonderful. (That's about all I have energy to type about right now.)

Baby Z is sleeping for longer and longer stretches at night. Right now he wakes up between 2-4am, and then again at 6 or 7am. Between MoBob and myself we can manage to get a reasonable amount of sleep. Z also sleeps during the day, and with the sister-in-law here I am relatively free to...pump breastmilk every couple of hours. I was actually able to sneak out to the library today and enjoy the sunshine. Breastfeeding is still a trial/chore/ordeal. But we're working on it.

Not exactly Madonna and child, but cute enough.

*for some reason the lyrics of "Little Wing" run through my mind these days

I've decided to do something every week that's both (1) out of the house and (2) somewhat intellectually stimulating. Last week I went to an event at SAIS on Stanley Karnow’s Southeast Asia. I read In Our Image: America's Empire in the Philippines in college - it informed and enraged me at the same time. To my knowledge there hasn't been any other exhaustive and accessible book about the US-Philippines relationship written by an American or Filipino. On Sunday MoBob and I went to his colleague's house for a retirement party. As always it's nice to meet and catch up with MB's co-workers. The hosts prepared Indian food; better than any restaurant. Then today I stayed for the first panel discussion of the ceremony honoring Asian-American/Pacific Islander Champions of Change at the White House. Really proud to see the winners as well as the audience members. So inspirational!

Coming up: I'm speaking on careers in international development at BYU Political Affairs Society national conference. In some ways I'm kind of glad I can hide my church membership on my resume. A lot of BYU alums have told me that it's led to awkward questions. The only hint is that I used to put the BYU Women's Research Institute (when it still existed) and the BYU International Society as professional affiliations.

Except for trips to the doctor, we have not taken Baby Z out *at all* mainly due to fatigue (both of us), recovery (me), and the sheer logistics of planning an outing around pumping, etc. But now that the SIL is here and Baby Z is sturdier, trips are more likely.

Today was the first meeting of the parent education group I joined (PACE) at the Hill Center. I'd heard great things about PACE - one of my co-workers told me that her mother still meets with her PACE group after 30+ years - and I hadn't visited the newly renovated Hill Center yet. So I braved a solo trip in the drizzle by Metro. Despite a long delay with the Green Line, we arrived without any problems, only a little late. Baby Z was a real trooper. He slept the whole way there and back despite the noise and motion of public transport. My main stress came from discovering that the elevators at L'Enfant Plaza were out so we had to get on the escalators. Another item for my "Bad Mommy" resume.

The PACE group demographic was similar to the other mommy group I belong too, though it also made a difference to have a facilitator and a theme for each meeting. I was reassured that the majority of the new moms were still dealing with the aftereffects of childbirths (especially c-sections) and grappling with breastfeeding, returning to work, and spouses/family members. Again, Baby Z was a treasure and slept through most of the discussion, except for a little snack and one diaper change.

snuggled up and on the move

I tell myself this every time I get up at 3am or 4am. The past week has been a blur of visitors, getting the sister-in-law settled, household stuff, and pumping/feeding Baby Z. MoBob and I take turns at night, usually because one hears the baby before the other. But he returns to work tomorrow and he needs his sleep to keep us solvent. The SIL has been a great help, despite not having a common language, but MB and I still have night duty. I'm trying to savor those early morning hours where it's just Baby Z and me, with MB's snores as our soundtrack, and the two of us sleepy and hunched over like little old men.

Lots of people have asked me what labor felt like. Well: menstrual cramps x 10,000 combined with the white hot rage aimed at a lifetime of ex-boyfriends. Got that? (And I was maxed out on painkillers.)